This is such a good article. Especially in light of the study published in NYT (I think) that indicates the most satisfied married people are gay men married to men, followed by women married to women, followed by men married to women, and, last, women married to men. In terms of contributing to the happiness of another human being as a marriage partner (just to use that arrangement since it was the focus of the study) a man who is able to marry another man has the highest “happiness-generating potential” for another person. Using that logic, a straight man could be considered the waste — though as you point out using the term “waste” is so powerfully shaming applied to a human being. Such a good article.